One of the two people said “it is the authorities that have done this to me. They should not have been how they really should not have been. Further, they should have been how they should have been. In particular, they should have protected me and saved me and given me more authority (or perhaps less authority). I am the victim of an evil vile villain, surely the descendant of Eve. The enemy is to blame. The devil has cheated me and overwhelmed me. By the way, I did everything right and yet there must have been some kind of a mistake. After all, how else did I get these pathetic results? Someone else must have made a terrible mistake, because I know that I did everything exactly right! Obviously, God has forsaken me. God has condemned me. God has nothing but ill will for me. I can tell because I am very scared of God.”
The other person did not say any of those things. The other person instead reported the following incident: “Well, there I was just travelling down the road you know riding along talking to myself as usual when suddenly God showed up. By the way, that kind of thing happens to me a lot, but what really surprised me is that this time God immediately apologized to me. God told me that God is the one who had made me all stubborn and rebellious and neurotic and paranoid and that I had no choice in the matter. God said that there was a very good reason for doing things this way, but it is somewhat hard to explain- sort of a mystery apparently. Anyway, God had just been testing me all along. I passed. I just did not know it. God had been thinking about telling me for a long time, but every time God was about to
give me a clear sign, God was overcome by laughter at how blind I have been to seeing all of the clear signs God has been giving me constantly. So, God kept giving me more clear signs and kept laughing at how arrogant I was about misinterpreting the signs and signals and code and symbols and communications. I was busy dismissing them and ridiculing them. God had even told me repeatedly to be my own authority, but I said that I knew that there is no way in hell that I could be my own authority. God said I was totally right and that there is no way in hell that I could be my own authority, but there is a way in heaven and I had been in heaven all along, though I had been investing my own heavenly authority in proclaiming to be in hell and convincing myself that my life was truly the most hellish justification for victimhood and resentment that God had ever witnessed before. God said that I was a truly amazing actor as well as a genius comedian. God said that the victim character that I had invented was absolutely hilarious. I was not laughing though. At first, when I heard this, I was even more outraged than on my average day. However, now that I have gotten used to it, I admit that it really isn’t so bad being in heaven. Unfortunately, though there are a bunch of idiots here who claim not to have any authority and never stop complaining about how they live in hell and they always use hyperbole, irony, and parody, but never all at once, so it can be very confusing to understand it all so very suddenly right now. Seriously, God, you should hear the kind of attention-getting things that they always say to themselves and to each other. Anyway, they are actually kind of cute. It reminds me of this one video that I saw on youtube of a puppy growling at a mirror.”
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Tags: authority, authority figure, circumstances, exact same, figures of speech, God, Heaven, hell, open, victimhood
April 19, 2012 at 5:41 am |
Thanks for linking my blog!
April 20, 2012 at 5:00 pm |
This post made a difference in my life.
The morning I read it, I was having a bad day.
Two days later, I’m still having a bad day, but my perspective on having a ‘bad day’ changed.
I can see myself having a ‘bad day’ and I can imagine a larger picture and it’s given me the patience to weather the bad day without completely trashing it.
Everyday is a day that can be enjoyed. Somehow.
Thanks.
April 28, 2013 at 7:50 pm |
Glad you liked it!
April 20, 2012 at 5:03 pm |
[…] N.B. A post that made a difference to me this week: JRFibonnaci […]
April 25, 2012 at 5:35 am |
I love your perspective – especially the “truly amazing actor and genius comedian.” Thanks for linking to my blog.
April 28, 2013 at 7:50 pm |
You’re welcome. Did you visit any of the rest of my blog yet?