Posts Tagged ‘should’

Free… to be trapped?

August 19, 2014

Free… to be trapped?

Free from the fear of fear… and to fear fear
Free to fear without shame… or to fear with shame
Free to deny my freedom
Free to pretend to be trapped… by words
I only regret what I should have done, but did not… according to me
I only feel guilt for what should not have happened… according to me

I can condemn the past… or not

I can say I wish now it had been something different… or not

I was only disappointed that my hidden fears were revealed
I was only frustrated that my strategies to hide those fears failed

Fortunately, unlike other lesser humans, I was never naive.

My expectations have never been violated by my experience.
My presumptions have never been updated or discarded.
Am I embarrassed to have ever learned anything ever? Not at all.
Because I have never experienced confusion, seven is not eleven minus four hundred.
I am better than those folks who try to prevent the experiences of fear and courage.
I am way better than that one guy who obsessively protected the world from paranoia.

Because of my unmatched excellence, everyone should be above average since we are in this together.

Don’t you just hate the kind of people who always complain about exagerrations?

  • Daniel Fritschler: You sure are arrogant! 😉 You should be more like me. Somebody who not only feels fear but isn’t ashamed to share it in a public forum. Until then everything you experience will start to knock you off of your high horse.
     · Unlike ·

  • J R Fibonacci Hunn: Humiliation is the natural result of arrogance (an obsessive fear of displaying fear).

related video:

How should other people be different… or should they?

June 14, 2014

M.W. wrote: ““We live in a society of addiction. Fake desires are created and pushed on us in the guise of spiritual or selfimprovement ideals, and we do not learn to recognize or act on our real desires. Trying to be something you are not is the cause of human suffering. This is addiction. From the ultimate pop star to a homeless person, we are trying to get somewhere as if we are not already the unadorned marvel of life. The solutions to our plight are usually more of the same: one stronger pill after the other, one exaggeration after the next, as despair increases.” ”

JR replies:

“Fake desires” are programmed in schools (and churches… and media). The teacher provides the questions and then also rewards the approved answers. Curiosity may be punished (as distracting from the holy curriculum). We are trained what to be paranoid about (alarmist about) and, by implication, anything that is not publicized as important is presumed less important than the highly-publicized “crisis.”

The basic propaganda issue is the dividing of life in to “how it should be” and “how it should not be.” That training creates a chronic tension to present to others (truly or not) that one is “how one should be” and to repress or hide or distract from “how one should not be.”

Why the hysterical arguing over something like cholesterol or vaccines or global warming? It is because people are so terrified of being revealed to be wrong. The arguing may eventually take the tone of a hyperventilating panic: “I am not open to unfamiliar information because I am a skeptical scientist!”

The paranoia tends toward delirium. Paranoia about what? It may be as simple as this: “how dare anyone accuse me of ever having experienced fear?!?!?”

Shame is the dominant theme of so many people’s lives. The pinnacle of shame is the rejection of competitiveness (AKA “responsibility, self-interest”): the idea of doing something with a preference for my own welfare (or that of my family,business, nation,etc) over an obsession for the alleged welfare of “the greater good.” It is an obsession with social approval. It is crippling- or an indicator of someone who has been emotionally crippled.


lyrics: “I just can’t”

January 29, 2013
do i deserve better; do i deserve worse; do i deserve everything that i don’t deserve
according to some model; according to some rules;
according to some people’s claims all made of words
I should not believe it, but I should not protest; I should not do what I should according to them
yet I should not rebel, though I should not obey; I should make up rules for what should not be made.
Do I deserve models; do I deserve rules; do I deserve anything that I should deserve
Do I deserve rebels; do I deserve words; do I deserve anything I should not deserve

Deserve a quiet night.

Deserve a quiet night. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I should not ask questions, except if I should; I should not give answers that have not been earned
I should not be talking; I can’t think before I think, so I should do what I can’t for that could set me free
of believing I’ve been trapped inside a maze of words, of perceiving that I am what I should not deserve
I think I am the universe thinking of itself, unless of course I should be any someone else
the universe deserves me but I should deserve it too which implies that I don’t and that may not be true
but I don’t want the universe crawling ’round inside; i think I should kill it before it takes my life.
If I should do what I can’t, then I can’t do what I should.
If I could do what I can’t, then I can’t do what i could
Have I been pretending that I cannot pretend, that I shouldn’t, that I wouldn’t, that I don’t know that I am
Have I been defending what I don’t deserve, what I shouldn’t, what I mustn’t, what I could never earn
I just can’t decide  whether to admit what I like:  the things that I shouldn’t, that I wouldn’t, that I might
I just can’t believe  that I could ever be free         so I carry around chains   waiting for the guard to sleep
I pretend to be trapped  like a mime cuffed and chained   I pretend I just can’t  help defending my own cage
I am on guard inside my prison with an open door     I must make sure no one escapes  I must police my whole world
If I should do what I can’t, then I can’t do what I should.
If I could do what I can’t, then I can’t do what i could
written: 1/9/2012

Being the great change (and the language of grace)

March 23, 2012

Being the great change:

The Great Comet of 2011
The Great Comet of 2011 (Photo credit: lrargerich)

Could you ever be how you should not be?

Many place themselves outside of their world, outside of their life, and in opposition to their life and their world. That way of identifying is conflict and suffering.

Here is how it happens. We learn words. That is when things get confusing.

The confusion or problem is not in life, but in the words. There is no such thing as a problem until someone says so.

A problem is something that (allegedly) should not be how it is. Problems are created by the concept that something should be other than it is.


Confusion (Photo credit: Kaleenxian)

As long as something should be how it is not, that is a problem- not the thing itself, but the perception that it should be how it isn’t. It is how it is. That isn’t a problem in itself, but we can make “it is how it is” into a cause for confusion, conflict, and suffering, simply with the use of words.

“Here is how it should be” is declared by words for a reason. The reason to declare “here is how it should be” is to hide how it is.

When one is operating from the concept of “here is how it should be,” then anything that is not how it should be is how it should not be. The concept of “how it should be” creates the possibility of “how it should not be.”

We may try to ignore how it should not be. We may violently oppose how it should not be. However, as long as there is a way how it should be, how it is may not fit how it should be, and clearly that is how it should not be.

How it should be is the source of how it should not be, such as “that traffic light should be green, not red. The one facing me should be green, not that one facing the other direction. Wait, I cannot tell which traffic signal is facing me. I should be able to tell. I should not be unable to tell. I should not be confused. This is wrong. Something must be wrong. It cannot be me. It must be someone else. Wow, this really should not be so confusing!”

Confusing signal

Confusing signal (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

So, those who worship “how it should be” live in opposition to or even denial of how it simply is, then fear that “how it simply is” may be recognized as “other than how it should be, ” then, upon recognition that how it is may not be how it should be, anger arises. How it should be is how it should be! How it should not be is how it should not be!

Various versions of “how it should (not) be” manifest across the various times and places and language patterns. The frightened anger over the gap between how it is and how it should be is what leads to worry and war. Agruments start over which way it should be and how to fix it.

Frustration and exhaustion and blame all are branches of the concept of how it should be. The question may arise as to “who is to blame for the gap between how it should be and how it obviously is?” The urgent question may arise as to “how can we fix how it is and make how it is conform with the whatever particular version of how it should be?” The desperate question may arise of “how can we save our children from the gap between how it should be (which is allegedly very important) and how it is (which is allegedly only important secondarily)?”

Now, how is it that “how it should be” is used to hide how it is? By promoting “how it should be,” that automatically creates “how it should not be.” When “how it should not be” is worshiped as more important than how it is, how it is must be rejected as confusing. How it is must be experienced as a problem, as the cause of suffering. How it is must be fixed.

However, what if “how it is” is never the cause of suffering? What if suffering is just one way of relating to “how it is,” particularly relating to how it is as less important than a linguistic belief (idolatry) that we label “how it should be?” If it were not for the arrogant, vain worship of “how it should be,” then “how it is” would never have been labeled “how it should not be” as in “the problem” as in “the cause of suffering.” In other words, idolatrous morality (AKA shame) is the cause of suffering.

To the one worshiping the existence of sin and shame and so on, what must be fixed is one’s own self. When one identifies any aspect of one’s own self as how one should not be, that self-rejecting projects a “psychological shadow” at the world (at life).

Since one obviously must not be how one should not be, the world out there must be the domain of how it should not be. Clearly, over here is the domain of how it should be: just ask me! Over there, though, that is the domain of how it should not be: again, just ask ANYONE!

Words have a power all their own

Words have a power all their own (Photo credit: waɪ.tiː)

Then along comes some sages who say RIDICULOUS things like this: “I did not come to judge the world. I came to take away sin…. Do not remove the speck from the other’s perception, but the beam from your own.” Obviously, these folks are asking for trouble!

On the other hand, these folks seem not to be at all troubled- not by their world or anyone in it or their own past or present or future. How come they are not troubled like everyone else? Confusing, wasn’t it?

Be the great change. Do not make great changes to fix the world into how it should be. Simply notice the changing of the world, your world, your life, your self.

Reclaim what you used to call “over there” as you, even the language of “how it should be” which may be used to hide how it is. If you play a little hide and seek with yourself, so be it. If you pretend to be confused, so be it. If you pretend to be something other than the Great Change itself, so be it. If you pretend that there is a gap between how it should be and how it is, that is one way that you could be about how your life may be. A very serious problem, wasn’t it?

Published on: Dec 24, 2009

Related articles

parody on the language of propaganda: “that should be different, too!”

March 3, 2012

“that should be different, too”

A Grateful Tirade: ”that should be different, too”

NO NO NO! All of you are totally wrong, especially you, you, and definitely you and, last but certainly not least, me.

Nothing is as it should be. Everything is all wrong. I should know.

Wrong Is Right

Wrong Is Right (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Now, given that we all now agree that everything is totally wrong, it is absolutely, desperately imperative that we fix EVERYTHING, and right away, so that each thing can be some different form of how it should not be, entirely accidentally, and with no particular importance to anything that we have ever said or done….

Some of us may wish to start by changing the government or the financial system into ANYTHING other than how it should not be how it currently is. It still may not be how it obviously should be, of course, but at least it won’t be like THIS. EGAD!

That whole stupid idea of stupidity, of course, is totally stupid, but go for it if you like. Personally, I’ll leave all that to you and I’m going to go around trying to change the way that my ex spells the word should.

That’s right. She is spelling it totally wrong. It’s a scandal.

Listen closely: “shood.” Clearly, it was only some idiot that wood spell shood with an L! (She knowls who she is!)

We shood have nolticed this from the start, but, loolk, there is alsolulely nolthing about any of us that is how we shood be. Everything is exactly howl it shood not be, even the shape of the letter L… ESPECIALLY thalt! EGALD!

So, for VERY good reasons, I am very disappointed. I’m angry at how angry my ex was pretending not to be. I shood have saved her, but maybe it’s not too late… not yet, right?

I can wait. How soon is it until it’s too late to save the world from being exactly how it shood not be?

I’m only asking because I really shood get back to doing a few things around the little box in which I live. I’ve only got so much time, you know!

Anyway, after I fix the way that my ex spells shood uncorrectly and then almost make a sincere effort to attempt to try to save the world from the world real quick, I’d like to have a word with myself for a moment, young man:

I am very disappointed about how you have been pretending that the world should not be how it may actually be. It’s not the basic idea that it should not be how it should not be, because obviously it should not be how it obviously should not be.

It’s the WAY that you have been pretending that it should not be like this. I know that you know that I know what you are talking about, so do Anger Management

not go trying to play stupid with me, buddy, okay? I know ALL your tricks. I invented them ourselves.

So, we agree now that you should not be pretending in that particular WAY. It’s VERY disappointing… obviously!

Anyway, I’m sure you can fix it. You’ll probably do it wrong, of course, but I am sure that you COULD fix it.

You just won’t. You always refuse. You’re so stubborn sometimes, like especially about not agreeing with me about my particular way of seeing how the world should not be like it is. Then again, I suppose that is only to be expected… from someone like you!

published: Nov 26, 2009

Related articles

complaints about complaints

January 12, 2012


Spit in the wind hits my own face

I heard the words of old complaints

I blame the world for how it is

I relate to it as a shame

it should not be the way it is

it should be like in sacred myths

I learned them from a TV screen

a preacher teaching us his dream

a creature pumping her campaign

of ads for politics of hate

“There is the thing that should not be

Here is the only remedy

No, here’s the cure- no, here’s relief

for side effects of wonder drugs

treating the symptoms not the cause

by cutting wires to quiet alarms

just make them silent; make them stop

will I complain “I turned them off!”

I can’t believe the things I did

I can’t believe the way I am

I can’t believe the things I say

I can’t believe how I pretend

to blame the world for how it is

to relate to it as a shame

it should not be the way it is

it should be like in sacred myths

of innocent, ignorant bliss

not victimizing me like this

it should not label me like that

or is it me who labels it?

Spit in the wind hits my own face

I hurled the words of old complaints

about complaints about complaints about complaints

New super-condensed version of Buddhism‘s 4 noble truths:

1) the truth of complaints
2) the truth of complaining as the cause of complaints
3) the truth of complaints vanishing in the absence of complaining
4) the truth of whether or not there can be a life after complaining
English: The moment of revealing four noble tr...

Image via Wikipedia

no such thing… as original sin?

January 2, 2012
NO SUCH THING (as Original Sin)
Life should be how life should be, so life should not be so much like this.
I should be how I should be, so I should not be so much like this.
She should be how she should be, so she should not be so much like this.
We should be how we should be, so we should not be so much like this.
Now, who is going to fix all this mess which we made up by labeling all this a mess?
and how will they ever fix all this mess which we made up by labeling all this a mess?
who can we blame for making all this mess which we made up by labeling all this a mess?
who can we hate for not fixing this mess which we made up by labeling all this a mess?
Is the original sin the naming of a sinner or just the naming of a sin?
Eve should be how Eve should be, so Eve should not be be so much like this.
Evil should be how Evil should be, so Evil should not be be so much like this.
There should be no such thing as Evil and no such thing as blame
There should be no such thing as labels and no such thing as hate
There should be no such thing as what should be and no such thing as sin
There should be what should be and nothing else; things should not be so much like this.

Now, who is going to fix all this mess which we made up by labeling all this a mess?
and how will they ever fix all this mess which we made up by labeling all this a mess?
who can we blame for making this mess which we made up by labeling all this a mess?
who can we hate for not fixing this mess which we made up by labeling all this a mess?

song: “a new label” (the secret of language)

January 1, 2012
a new label (the secret of language)
My words are law
as long as you obey them
My name is God
but you can call me Satan
I tell you what should be
I train you in the art of hating
I may say it’s all for you
but maybe I am making
out like a bandit
as in pirate
as in banking
cartel empire monopoly
mafia syndicate racketeering
politician drama mythology
one party media propaganda machine
It’s not crazy talk
unless you don’t know the code
Can you speak Jabberwock?
If not, then don’t interpret it as broken
My dog only hears noise
when you speak in fluent Latin
Letters are just shapes
until you learn the whole alphabet
I know the secret
you have been trained does not exist
But I can’t tell you
Till you stop resisting and just listen
to the sounds
before you make them in to words
what do they mean
is it gibberish, brilliant, or absurd
Well you won’t know until you get it
and you won’t get it till you wake
up to the power of the language in the brain
is it a mystery
or is it confusing
if I use words
beyond your fluency
ignorance is not confusion
what is confusion
is there even really such a thing?
how would you know?
compared to what?
are you only dreaming
that you’re just a front
a facade, a fake, a layer of an onion
claiming to be the whole enchilada
is it the opposite: a giant pretending to be small
are you God playing the victim of your shadow on the wall
people should not be evil
as in powerful
so if someone shows power
then we must hate them
why must we hate them
because I said so
but what difference does that make
hell, I don’t know
I hate the politicians
cause they taught me how to hate
I blame the propagandists
cause they told me not to blame
Diagnosis is hypnosis
a new label refills the jar
my excuses are the juiciest
my problems are so hard
I can’t beat the system
because I think I should
I won’t give up suffering
feeling bad looks too good
I caught hypochondria
and it is incurable
I got an immune system
but it isn’t working
it’s coughing and sneezing
I don’t know what is wrong
it’s vomiting and wheezing
we should probably turn it off
If people should not be powerful, that includes me
If people should not be anything, that includes me
So sacrifice your limits at the risk of being free
is your only limit idolatry
the false gods you worship so loyally
is it a church, teacher or ideology
who taught it to you
or was it written on your heart directly by God
and is that who you are certain that you are not
so you need a mediator, priest or courier
Jesus said:
“I am the gate” and “I am the way
the truth and the life,” but what does that mean?
Yes, it’s translated,
but the point is not going through another,
not using good works nor one certain method
Straight to God, directly, no intermediary
no intercessor, for “I am the truth” already
but what say you?
do you deny that there is a light within you
or is there only the light
and the identity in language is just a shadow?

Philip said, “Lord, show us the Father and that will be enough for us.”

9Jesus answered: “Don’t you know me, Philip, even after I have been among you such a long time? Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, ‘Show us the Father’? 10Don’t you believe that I am in the Father, and that the Father is in me? The words I say to you are not just my own. Rather, it is the Father, living in me, who is doing his work…. You will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you.”

My words are law
as long as you obey them
My name is God
but you can call me Satan
Is diagnosis hypnosis
does a new label really refill the jar
or are the contents still the same
with or without a new label made of thought?

stages of adaptive appreciation

October 14, 2011

The above audio contains a lot more clarification and information than the text below.

First, people begin innocent. Then, they are trained in how things should be and so become naively presumptive, though that is adaptive relative to the first stage.

Then, if the presumptive way does not work very well, some slight revisions are made in regard to the updated idealism of how things really should be, and now the reformed and refined presumptiveness becomes arrogance (as in self-righteousness). Again, that may be adaptive relative to the prior stage- using a more adapted model of presumptiveness.
Next, after perhaps a few distinct idealisms have been tried and have all failed to correspond to reality, a cynical perfectionism may develop. This is a reaction against all forms of presumptiveness, all models. This is a criticism against all forms of what allegedly should be. This can be called hypocrisy, for it is presuming that presumptiveness about how things should be is what should not be, which implicitly presumes that an innocent naivete is all that should ever be. Again, that may still be more adaptive than prior stages.
However, once that does not work well either, then humility and grace may eventually develop. Then there is an appreciation possible for every stage: naive innocence, naive presumptiveness, arrogant presumptiveness, arrogant cynicism, and humility.
These stages of adaption can be regrouped in to three distinctions: innocence, perfectionism, and humility. Perfectionism includes naive presumptiveness, arrogant presumptiveness, and arrogant cynicism.
We can even look at these as stages of appreciation. Initially, everything is equal. Then, various priorities and values are identified, learned and refined. Then, there is an appreciation for all models and all values and all priorities- just one at a time.
In other words, all of the models and presumptions are recognized as similar in that they are just models and presumptions. In any particular case, one or more models may be most relevant or useful. There can be an appreciation for each model as unique and for all models as only being models. There can be an appreciation for the creation of new models and discarding of old ones and naively or arrogantly clinging to certain ones or rejecting certain others.
Humility and appreciation may be two words for a single adaption. We might even call it “maturity.”

Responding with a curious courage… to recent financial developments

April 5, 2009

Responding with a curious courage… to recent financial developments

Quickly, let’s be clear what it does and does not mean to respond with a curious courage. I wonder if you can recall a time when you were not just already curious, but when your curiosity then led you to perceive a risk or danger that you only could have directly recognized through your own exploring, and then, after this discovery that you just made, you courageously redirected your behavior away from the perceived risk and toward a valuable opportunity that, again, you only discovered through the practice of curiosity. Let’s call that time now.

In contrast, what a curious courage does not mean is this: to identify how reality should have been, whether or not it was, then, when some pattern of reality did not fit with how it allegedly should have been, then to identify that pattern of reality as having been a problem, and then choose not to take any new initiative toward personal responsibility for one’s own future, but instead focus anger on whoever was convenient to blame for that problematic reality, and finally, identify whoever first provided you someone to blame for that problematic reality as the one to blindly rely on to almost fix that problematic reality next, since reality may persistently thwart reactive efforts to fix it by first blaming someone else for why it was not how it should have been (according to whoever denied that reality should be however reality actually already is).

Now, with a curious courage, we could be asking how did this particular apparent reality develop- yet with a specific concern for one’s own prior practices and the resulting effects produced from one’s own prior practices. That personal identification of one’s own prior practices as the primary issue related to the results produced by those practices is what may take courage.

So, let’s imagine that someone went to a casino and did very well for quite a while. They soon developed confidence and came back to the casino again and again. They made consistent unearned gains by using a certain method that worked for them over and over.

However, yesterday, they used that same old method but got a different result, that one which they do not value. Then, they kept trying that same method again and continued to get the result that they do not value. Soon, they lost quite a bit of their prior unearned gains- or even all of those gains as well as all of their original investment or even more.

Maybe they were afraid to even think about or look at their recent results. They may have been focusing on how much they used to have as if that was somehow more relevant than what they have left.

What would it mean to respond to this situation with a curious courage? Would it be courageous to look for someone else to blame for the recent results? Maybe you blamed the casino itself, or the government regulators, or a certain current or former employee of the casino, or perhaps your neighbor or even your neighbor’s dog.

Now, I might suggest that the particular investing method that you used is what produced the unfavorable result. Of course, it could be possible that the casino or government regulators did change some relevant rule, yet even if that were true, identifying such a change would not make your old method back into one that produces favorable results. If some rule had been changed and that is the single reason why your old method was no longer valuable, then knowing what rule has been changed might provide some insight into what other method might be valuable now, but you may not be interested in that yet.

After all, if the reason the rule was changed is because of your neighbor’s dog, then you could continue to use the method that stopped working but just get really angry at the dog. Or, while you continue to use the method that stopped working, maybe you could kill the dog, and then maybe someone would change the rule back so that your old method that stopped working might work again one day eventually, and you could just keep using it for as long as it takes, even though until that might happen you may be producing results with that method that you definitely may not value, because one day it could work again- you know, hypothetically.

That all could be true. One other thing though that someone with a curious courage might wonder is this: what about discontinuing the use of whatever prior method already stopped working to produced unearned capital gains? Sure, maybe the dog can be killed and the rule can be changed back to how it was and so one day possibly in the not-too-distant future the old method that stopped working may work again, but how about now? Sure, maybe someone can identify the neighbor that might have been in some way responsible for preventing you from continuing to multiply the unearned capital gains that you used to compound, and then maybe someone can get that neighbor to remedy the situation by paying to bail out the casinos that have suffered incredibly all because of that one dog. However, what about reconsidering the investing method which however long ago stopped working to produce the results you value?

Even if you advocate for a possible return back towards the prior situation, another possibility is that you explore modifying your investing method, at least until all dogs are killed so that you can know that no other dogs will ever prevent you from multiplying unearned capital gains with the single method that is most familiar to you, which is probably borrowing money to invest in real estate, but it could also be dumping money into various stocks and hoping that those stocks go up in value at least enough to balance any inflation and taxes.

I know a lot of people who I warned many years ago about the specific market developments that have since rendered their previously valuable methods worthless, resulting in losses of some or all of their unearned gains in real estate equity (or in US tech stocks or UK financial stocks and so on). Some of them even owe more on their mortgage than the collateral property is worth.

I also know a lot of people who have watched me make consistently accurately predictions of a variety of ups and downs in a variety of markets. Some of them may never give up the methods that they previously used to produce consistent unearned gains for them but that recently stopped working. Some of them may not ever explore a principle that works in all market conditions: partnering with the reality of market conditions and even partnering with someone who knows how to find opportunity in all market conditions now.

That might require a curious courage. Not everyone has that. For those of us who do have it, the fact that not everyone else has it is related to what distinguishes our results from their results, which includes the curiosity to be honest about the reality of market conditions, rather than defining some patterns of reality as “problems” to be automatically reacted to with personal blaming and blind devotion in the latest emergency rescue fix proposed, whether that is a political “solution” or some other silver bullet, like, whenever one has been confused, just investing in silver (or real estate etc) as the one magic solution to the persisting problem of reality not being the same as someone told you it should be.

Consider that reality is only a problem for those who insist on investing in opposition to it. For those with a curious courage, reality is an opportunity to partner. Now, with me and the investing methods that fit with partnering with the reality of market conditions, certain people get consistently favorable results in all market conditions. Not everyone will contact someone committed to partnering with reality to let me know that they are interested in consistently favorable results, but what about you?


“Life is not what it’s supposed to be. Its what it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference.” Virginia Satir (1916-1988)

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