J R Fibonacci Hunn So, are you saying that integrity, by that definition, must be at the sacrifice of personal welfare? Are they (integrity and personal welfare) contrasting opposites that can NEVER be aligned?
For instance, if I give generously to my grandchildren, someone can CALL that selfishness OR integrity. Which is it? Could it be that I am much more concerned with the experiences of a select few people than I am of the experiences of people in general?
When people are not attentive to the use of language, then they may imply that personal welfare is not a valid value. Or, maybe they are intentionally promoting self-sabotage in others.
I like to use this terminology: there are priorities and there are preferences. “God” gives me all of my priorities and all of my preferences.
I can experience a priority clearly coming in to focus and then I may choose to sacrifice certain preferences in favor of the priority. Again, I can name “God” as the source of the experience of having clarity and focus.
There can be subtle “contexts of shame” in regard to guilt-tripping other people for being “not generous enough.” There can be a subtle context of personal anxiety as well in regard to “not being generous enough” or “not being respected enough” or “not being loved enough.”
So, in anxiety, I may parade a “lack of concern for personal gain.” However, every bit of that parading may be in service of my long-term reputation (and welfare). Further, many people may compromise their own welfare in order to sustain some persistent complaint along the lines of “I deserve to suffer more.”Finally, I can name God as the source of all of these varieties of experiences (and all of these linguistic patterns of relating, plus language itself, plus everything else including me). I can begin with a stack of presumptions about how life should be, then go around and judge which things God is doing right and which things God is doing wrong. I can call that idolatry as well as hell: “I am in distress because of the following list of things which should not be how I perceive them to be: _____.”
Priority or preference: a great reputation