“Do not worship the prophet Noah!” – God



God the Almighty author says “hey, here is how this goes. The witness over there will be taking notes. The actors over here will be playing roles.”


“But which one should we worship,” asked someone in the second row.
God said, “that’s a good question, so let’s ask someone who knows.”


In the first row, a man stood up and said “My name is Joe. I am a prophet which means I tell you what you need to know. I’ll tell you all your future, but first let’s start with Noah.”

Then an old man with a long beard stood up by Joe. “Hello, God will kill you all unless you follow me, folks. If you disobey, eternal torture awaits. But if you’re good how I say, paradise will be your pay.”

Joe started clapping and said “Noah, you’re our savior. Soon all of us will know which is bad or good behavior. If you have questions, just come ask. We’ll be in the torture chamber.”

Soon, a little kid in the back yelled “people, wake up, please. These guys are lying! We’ll unite and bring them to their knees.”

Then all the protestants revealed their banners and signs. “Unite against conformity” they chanted many times.

A soldier fired a warning shot and said “everyone, be quiet. We will settle this next week at the memorial riot (which is where we all cast votes to show our opposition to violence). That’s because we’re civilized enough to know that heaven should be silent.”

So everyone went back to work and kept paying taxes. Joe used tax funds to support the rebel kid’s political actions.

Noah said, “this boy is really our very best agent. He’s sincere and naive, so his charisma is contagious.”

The loyal voters were all passionate when they showed up for the ritual. Soon, the results were announced and the reaction was typical. The brave losers were told that their side had won. So of course they had a huge victory celebration.”

“Right, but who or what should we worship,” asked that girl in the second row.

Joe said “justice: that’s how things should be different. Now get back to work. Go!”

“Hold it, Joe, what about telling us our future? When will you reveal it?”
“You will work and then count how much you owe in taxes to us. We’ll then give some of that back to you after we steal it.”


Everyone started clapping when Joe thanked Noah for delivering salvation. Noah said “please, that is quite enough. It’s all of you who deserve the ovation.”



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